No Regrets

Sometimes it is hard to live with no regrets. There are times in our lives that we wish we go back, do differently, and see what the future holds from there. It’s a killer to think about, but it’s inevitable.

I try to live with no regrets. I mean, there was a time in fifth grade when I told off my best friend because another friend I had didn’t like her. I felt awful about it after that and cherished her friendship after that. Oh, and I got rid of the “new friend.”

One thing I’ve always struggled with is keeping friendships, because I have a hard time being friends with girls. I just don’t relate to girls like I wish I could. I think that is because I enjoy things guys like and not much of the things girls like. So being friends with guys has just been easier. Well, kinda.

In high school, my best friend, without a doubt, was a guy. I loved talking to him, hanging out with him and even reading Twilight together, so we could discuss it after we each finished. Goodness, times were wonderful. I always feared things would become awkward if either of us felt like we should be more than friends, especially as my senior year came to an end.

But I didn’t care that much after I went to college. I tried to talk to him as much as possible, but I got busy, and he was the first thing to leave my life. Why? Because I was naïve. During college, my closest friends have always been guys, just like in high school. But it always ended the same, he would want to be “more than friends” and I would back off completely, never speaking to him again. He went from a great friend to an avoidance.

I’ve learned from these mistakes, though. I realize I have not been the best friend anyone could ask for because I fail to be there when needed. I just have to think that there’s a reason everything has turned out the way it is today. I just have to realize the choices I made are somehow in God’s plan and everything will work accordingly. I pray for you to be in my life once again and if that’s what God had planned, I know it will happen. I’m sorry.